Give me one dollar

Chris Bilauca

Friday, May 16, 2014

You have said, “Seek my face.” My heart says to you, “Your face, Lord, do I seek.”
Psalm 27.8

In Haiti, every village you enter is filled with kids that run up to you, grab your hand, jump on your neck, raise their hands to be picked up – it’s a fun riot. Most of them, at some point during your discourse with them will utter a phrase that quickly becomes predictable: “Give me one dollar.” For some of the kids, they run right up to you and ask confrontationally: “You! Give me one dollar.” For others, they build a repore, play with you before asking, but most of them will at some point ask you for something. The mission has a policy against handing anything out in the village which sometimes makes answering their request difficult, but I noticed it was harder for me to say no to some than to others.

What’s funny is that the kids who come straight up and ask for something, are the ones I’m least empathetic to. The kids that ask after some time in my presence, maybe. But oh, the rare kid that comes and is purely content to stay in my presence without any indication of wanting something from be besides my company, they are the ones I want to give something the most! It was excruciating for me to get on the vehicle and drive away, looking back to them contently smiling and waving; I would have loved to give those kids everything I had on me! They didn’t ask for anything, but their love compelled me to want to give in a way that no question from their lips could.

God gave me an analogy between this and how we approach Him in prayer. When I come before His throne, what am I really interested in? Am I content to simply be in presence, marveling in worship, or am I just waiting for Him to give me something so I can say a quick thanks, run out of the room and enjoy His gift? Where are my figurative eyes, on His face, or merely on His hand? Put your hand in your pocket in Haiti, and you can count on the kids nudging each other to draw their attention, all eyes fixed on your hand to see what treat or present might come out. Are we that way with God? The miracles we seek, the things we ask for, is it just to spend on ourselves? Are we part of the wicked and perverse generation that thirsts for the sensuality of signs and wonders, with no actual interest in the Father? Am I seeking His face, or are my eyes side-longingly fixed on His hand?

It’s not about faking it, but there is a way to have the Creator of the universe cater to your everyday needs: It’s by forgetting all about your needs and simply delighting in Him. It’s about authentically growing to love God to the level where we are content with Him, and Him alone. Not Him and His presents, just Him and His presence. Everything else falls into place after that – the God whose heart swells at seeing His child delight in Him ensures that! The Father loves so much that child that first seeks His Kingdom, that He will take care of everything that that child could ever need. It’s His promise. (Wait, aren’t there verses for this somewhere?)

Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.
Psalm 37.4

Seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.
Matthew 6.33

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